Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Depart not from the Path

Last time I wrote things hadn't really been the most positive in my life, and it seemed like the trend continued for a while. I seemed to struggle for a bit to stay the course, I felt betrayed by some, began to let my own insecurities get the best of me, and a friend of mine passed away... I've found that these times for me really make me doubt my faith. Don't get me wrong, I don't consider myself a religious man, by faith I really mean faith in myself and what I've chose to do with my life. It seemed as though for a while a lot of negative things just seemed to keep happening around me, and while I tried to see the silver lining it became pretty hard. Thoughts of graduation doesn't seem to help any, while exciting as this may be, it's also a very scary time... especially when I don't exactly have a plan. While I do seem to be pretty organized most of the time, life has been fairly unplanned for me and sometimes it's the unexpected that's proven to be the best thing for me. I guess one of my greatest fears is that these unexpected things will just stop happening, that karma will have run it's self out and this will have been the best time of my life. Yet I got a fortune cookie the other day, and while I typically don't pay much attention to these, this one read "Depart not from the path which fate has assigned." Sort of ironic considering my mindset lately...

Just as things have been hard for a while, things are beginning to look up and I'm beginning to find some sort of normalcy again. Work both at school and at the EMC have been going fairly well recently, and not to mention I won a scholarship with Lauren and Mike to go to GDC!!! It sort of finally struck me the other day, just how amazing this is! I mean I remember watching coverage of this event as a child, eagerly awaiting what new things will be released and what will be said... and this year I'll be there for it. I feel like my life has continual been extreme ups and downs, while I've been granted many great opportunities, I've had my fair share of hard times as well... As long as the good times continue to follow the bad I guess I'll be alright. Assuming I'll be able to find a job of sorts after college. Ugh, while I have so many fears still I've been trying my best to remain positive. This has been the greatest adventure of my life, and I just hope that another awaits me after college.

Anyways I'm not sure what else to say for now, as always I remain fairly busy with everything I get myself involved in... Here's to hoping the ride isn't over.